and i'm just the boy who can't ever say no
and i'm just the sucker who gives in all the time
and i'm just the one who lets everyone push him over
today is thursday july 10th, 2008. today was a relatively boring school day where nothing exciting really happened. just boring class after boring class after boring class. like i said, nothing really exciting which means nothing to really write about so honestly, i dont even know why i'm boring the living daylights out of you by typing all this. oh well. i have hockey later tonight. good. thank god.
right now, honestly, i am extremely annoyed and i am extremely pissed. like seriously, i don't think i ever felt this pissed or this annoyed in a really long time. URGHHHHHHHH! i honestly just want to punch a hole in the damn wall. i forsee myself getting a penalty tonight because ill let my anger and frustration get the better of me. DAMN IT! i need to relax and calm down but its been 45 minutes and i haven't really gotten any better. i hate this shit. im so sick of it. im so sick of it all.
i'm so sick of being some backup friend. i'm so sick of people only coming to talk when they need their problems solved. i'm so sick of being such a pushover and never knowing how to say no. i'm so sick at myself at letting it happen all the time. i'm so sick of people always treating me as their frikking punching bag. i'm so sick of people who just take out their frustration and anger on me when theyre upset about something. i'm so sick of people blaming me at getting pissed at me for no reason whatsoever. i'm not a stressball for you to relieve stress.. i really am ok with people whining to me or whatever cause i listen. i always do. whining crying, i dont mind. i dont mind at all. if youre upset, you whine cry or rant and im fine with all of the above. but im sick of people taking out their anger on me. and im so sick of people just chucking me to one side after things are better. i'm so sick of it. i'm so sick of it all..
sighh
that smile is like a ray of sun through the darkest of clouds
